Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Why I’m Giving Up Facebook For Lent,… (but not all the way)

Clearly, people can do whatever they want. By no means am I imposing MY conviction on anyone else. The heart of sacrificing something at Lent can be manifested in many different ways. It’s not a legalistic thing. But we all reach for things every day, and the idea is that by sacrificing one of those said things, we can recall Christ’s greater self-sacrifice on the cross. That's how it is with all fasting. You don't just fast from something to starve yourself, but fasting and feasting go together; you give something up so you can enjoy and dwell on something (someone) different.

And somehow, over the past few years, I have been reaching for Facebook with an ever-increasing frequency. Since it is on my iPhone, I look at it in bed even, right before sleep, and sometimes when I wake up. Over the years, I have even started thinking about my life in terms of status updates. Casey… “bought eggplant today, what do I do with it?” “hates the vampireous mosquitoes that are outside in February…” “looks forward to teething being over.” Over the top. No one needs to know or even cares about the minutia in my life. But updating statuses and checking others’ became a compulsive habit for me.

SO… when I saw that a handful of friends were giving up FB for Lent, I had a sneaking suspicion that maybe I should too. Facebook should be a tool for connecting with people, but it had become something that I probably spent an hour or more on a day (over way too many site visits). If I were to tell you what the priorities in my life were, you might believe me. But when we look at how a person spends their time, their priorities are telling. So this Lent, I am getting my priorities straight.

I decided not to give it up entirely, because that's another adventure in missing the point. I still want to be reachable, the site’s original intention. But I deleted it from my iPhone, which is how I usually looked at it. Who needs to be looking online at a traffic light, or at a friend’s house? That is how addicted I was, embarrassingly enough. I also decided not to go on it after 5 pm. I want to be more intentional with my husband, our baby and our friends, real, live people that life is lived alongside, rather than paying so much attention to a screen. I know that many people we love live far away, and that’s something that can’t be replaced; but sometimes I feel like I was spending more time with a screen than actual humans. So I need a change. Looking at a screen doesn’t fill loneliness or stimulate you in a healthy way. (I’ll try to avoid the rabbit hole of the porn industry here)

I’m not making rules about what this will look like for me, other than taking a Sabbath from it on Sundays. I just know that it needs to look different than it was. Maybe I will go on once a day, during a nap. I love seeing photos of friends’ kids, and don’t want to miss important things that are happening. But I won’t be checking and writing compulsively, like before. Maybe I’ll write a status update once a week, or maybe not until Easter. But I do know that instead of being on FB, I’ll be living life abundantly, instead of just trying to make it sound as though I am.

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